Ashley Ruba: While I had the skills to succeed in academia, I did not have the temperament
Ashley Ruba, Founder of After Academia, shared a post on X/Twitter:
“At 2 AM on December 25, 2021, I couldn’t sleep.
I called my partner: “I’m quitting my post-doc.”
“Are you sure?” he asked. I could tell he was surprised – surprised that I would walk away from a career in which I had devoted much of my life. For which I had sacrificed so much. I could also tell that, secretly, he was relieved. He had seen how much my mental health had deteriorated in academia. How the constant pressure, rejection, and politics had taken its toll on me. I told him I was sure. I couldn’t keep doing this.
Looking back, I see that, while I absolutely had the skills to succeed in academia, I did not have the temperament. I understand now that this was due to undiagnosed ADHD and Autism. Academia wasn’t made for me. It was slowly breaking me into a million pieces. And I ignored the warning signs for so long – ignored my body, ignored my heart. I pushed myself to my breaking point.
Until that Christmas, when I gave myself the best gift: I finally decided to prioritize my happiness and my mental health. It’s been a very long two years, but I’ve finally found the one thing I’ve been searching for for my entire life: Peace. Merry Christmas, friends.”
Source: Ashley Ruba/X
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