Sachin H. Jain: Our most rewarding relationships are often our most reciprocal
Sachin H. Jain shared on LinkedIn:
”One of the most difficult (and unspoken) topics at work and in life is ‘asymmetric relationships.’ Our most rewarding relationships are often our most reciprocal.
Asymmetry can exist in:
- How much someone values a relationship.
- How much effort one puts into a relationship.
- How much regard one person has for another.
- The different rules and norms by which one person engages another.
- How much appreciation demonstrates for someone or another.
Personally, I have always found this type of asymmetry painful and challenging to address—sometimes leading to bitterness and disappointment and frustration.
There are really only three solutions to asymmetry:
First, we can address it with the other person. This can surface an unstated expectation and can lead to repair and healing. It can also be embarrassing or disappointing.
Second, we can walk away from the relationship altogether. This extracts us from the situation—but often leaves us with a feeling of loss and thoughts of what could have been had we handled the situation differently.
And third (and probably necessary in most situations), we can accept it for what it is—and enjoy our relationships with others knowing they always won’t be balanced.
This can be a hard pill to swallow—but quiet acceptance is almost always a better place to live than quiet disappointment.”
Source: Sachin H. Jain/LinkedIn
Sachin Jain is the President and CEO of SCAN Group and Health Plan and an Adjunct Professor of Medicine at Stanford University School of Medicine. He also serves as a Board Member at The Paul and Daisy Soros Fellowships for New Americans, an Academic Hospitalist (WOC) at the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs, and a Board Member at America’s Health Insurance Plans (AHIP).